It Is I; Have No Fear
You know, walking on water sounds pretty impossible, especially if it's rough water.
Life can be rough at times. If I’m honest, my life has been rough at times. And when I let myself examine those times, you know what I find? Fear. I remember being afraid of what was going to happen, afraid of being humiliated, afraid that I was going to drown in the troubles and not survive. I remember the fear.
Of course, you may be able to relate. But know that being afraid is a completely understandable emotion when life threatens to crush you. I will never forget the look on a dear lady’s face when she came to me as her priest and poured out her heart to me about some tragic event happening to her. With tears, she said she was afraid. And I told her, “Sweet lady, being afraid in this circumstance is the most sane reaction to this trouble you could have.” She was relieved when I said feeling fear was completely reasonable. What was dangerous was allowing the fear to control her. That’s when the light came on in her eyes, and we were able to navigate the very real tragedy without allowing fear to intoxicate her with foolish choices.
Fear is a feeling. But feelings aren’t competent in making good choices or overcoming bad times! Fear has to be disciplined so that it doesn’t control you.
Look at our lesson today in Matthew 14:22-34:
At that time, Jesus made the disciples get into the boat and go before him to the other side, while he dismissed the crowds. And after he had dismissed the crowds, he went up into the hills by himself to pray. When evening came, he was there alone, but the boat by this time was many furlongs distant from the land, beaten by the waves; for the wind was against them. And in the fourth watch of the night he came to them, walking on the sea. But when the disciples saw him walking on the sea, they were terrified, saying, "It is a ghost!" And they cried out for fear. But immediately he spoke to them, saying "Take heart, it is I; have no fear."
And Peter answered him, "Lord, if it is you, bid me come to you on the water." He said, "Come." So Peter got out of the boat and walked on the water and came to Jesus; but when he saw the wind, he was afraid, and beginning to sink he cried out, "Lord, save me." Jesus immediately reached out his hand and caught him, saying to him, "O man of little faith, why did you doubt?" And when they entered the boat, the wind ceased. And those in the boat worshiped him, saying, "Truly you are the Son of God." And when they had crossed over, they came to land at Gennesaret.
If you’ve ever gone to Sunday School, you know this story well! Peter walking on the water with Jesus is an amazing moment in the Gospels, and the lessons this moment offers us unlock the power of Faith when life is scary!
The Story is straightforward. Jesus had sent His disciples to their next stop while He dismissed the crowd He had just taught, and then He went to pray. Amazing thought, isn’t it? Jesus kept a strong rhythm of regular prayer. You may say, “Why, Jesus is God in the flesh.” Well, remember, Jesus IS God in the Flesh, but He IS in the FLESH. That means He is also, at the same time as being 100% God, He is also 100% Human.
So, when you see Jesus praying, take this lesson: Jesus, as 100% Human, is teaching us how to be 100% Human in the best, truest, and fullest sense of that reality. To be truly Human, truly as God created you to be, you HAVE TO pray. Perios. Full Stop. End of discussion. Prayer is not optional. Prayer isn’t just for times of stress, trouble, or desire. Prayer IS Human Life. Prayer IS NORMAL. If you are EVER to be truly Human, it will be because you wisely develop a regular, faithful, consistent prayer practice. Your icon corner in your home becomes the spot where you learn how to be the real you. Jesus prayed regularly SO THAT you would follow His example.
In the 4th Watch of the Night (3 AM to Sunrise), Jesus made up the distance between Him and His disciples by walking on the water to catch up with them in the boat. By the way, the watches of the night were shifts to keep watch for tbe safety of the area. The First Watch was from 6 PM to 9 PM. The Second Watch was from 9 PM to Midnight, the Third Watch was from Midnight to 3 AM, and the Fourth Watch, well, you know.
Why so late? Why wait that long? Well, for starters, the Lord was in Prayer that long. Wirthy work demands appropriating valuable time to show just how important something is to you! You will ALWAYS alot time for what you consider most important. The problem is we humans all too often fail to discern the proper priorities in our lives, and it shows up in our challenges!
Because of the Lord’s priorities, He had His existence in proper order so that what would be impossible obstacles to us (I don’t really spend a lot of time walking across the water!) weren’t any obstacles to Him. The shortest distance between Him and His disciples meant crossing water. So He did. Getting to His Disciples was more important than worrying about what was between Him and His disciples. Of course, that’s how Christ feels about you as well!
Pretty scary scene for the disciples at that early hour and they freaked out. Jesus realized this would be a bit disconcerting, so He uttered the words He tells us over and over in our lives IF ONLY we would hear Him: It is I; Don’t be afraid!
So much more to say, but that’s enough for today.
St. Xenia, The Deaconness of Rome was a woman who wasn’t afraid because she was able to recognize Jesus in the middle of her persecution and troubles. She was supposed to be wed but desired a life of ascetical struggle, so she left in the middle of the night to go to a strange country where she took the name “Xenia” which means “stranger” in Greek. She passed her life as a monastic and served the Church as a deaconness assisting other women in serving Jesus Christ and His Church.
Today, does your prayer life so reorient your living that you can see and recognize Jessu even when life is hard? Are you being so formed by prioritizing your spiritual life that obstacles simply don’t stand in your way of living a Normal Ortho0dox Life? Today, Jesus says to you, no matter what you are going through: It is I. Don’t be afraid!
P.S. Celebrating the memorial of your life which you did live as a stranger, O Xenia, and honoring you with love, we praise Christ Who gave you the power to grant healings to all. Ever pray to Him for us all.
I have always found the way verse (Matthew 14-27 is translated as curious. ἐγώ εἰμι· μὴ φοβεῖσθε. Obviously the Lord is telling them not to be afraid, but the ἐγώ εἰμι means I AM. It is a much more powerful statement when translated that way. All of my English language bibles translate it as "It is I" It seems to me the Lord is using the first half of the Divine Name. No one in Hebrew or Aramaic said I am as that would be blaspheme. That had to use other word constructions to avoid using I am.
And look up!